Entries by The Babylon Bee

Murderer Undecided On Whether He'll Follow New Gun Laws

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Gregory Ilinovich loves murdering people with illegal guns – so he’s a bit concerned about all these new gun regulations. Luckily, he tends not to follow laws anyway. Become a premium subscriber: https://babylonbee.com/plans The Official The Babylon Bee Store: https://shop.babylonbee.com/ Follow The Babylon Bee: Website: https://babylonbee.com/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/thebabylonbee Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheBabylonBee Instagram: http://instagram.com/thebabylonbee SOURCE

Kamala Harris Aide Breaks Silence

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An exclusive interview with Vice President Harris’ Communications Assistant. Become a premium subscriber: https://babylonbee.com/plans The Official The Babylon Bee Store: https://shop.babylonbee.com/ Follow The Babylon Bee: Website: https://babylonbee.com/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/thebabylonbee Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheBabylonBee Instagram: http://instagram.com/thebabylonbee SOURCE

Legal Experts Ask Justice Sotomayor To Recuse Herself From Case Due To Her Being An Idiot

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In breaking news from the Supreme Court, legal scholars are suggesting that Justice Sonia Sotomayor recuse herself from the mandate case before the court, not because of any conflicting interests, but on suspicion that she’s a complete and total idiot. Become a premium subscriber: https://babylonbee.com/plans The Official The Babylon Bee Store: https://shop.babylonbee.com/ Follow The Babylon […]

Unvaccinated Man Feeling Left Out As All His Vaccinated Friends Have COVID

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Chris Smitherson has a problem: he’s unvaccinated — which means he’s left out of all activities as he doesn’t have COVID like his vaccinated friends. Thoughts and prayers. Become a premium subscriber: https://babylonbee.com/plans The Official The Babylon Bee Store: https://shop.babylonbee.com/ Follow The Babylon Bee: Website: https://babylonbee.com/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/thebabylonbee Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheBabylonBee Instagram: http://instagram.com/thebabylonbee SOURCE

Babylon Bee Weak-ly News Update 1/11/2022: Fart Jars and Jeopardy

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Host Adam Yenser gives us the news of the week, including a woman selling her farts in jars, a transgender Jeopardy contestant, and lots of cold weather. Become a premium subscriber: https://babylonbee.com/plans The Official The Babylon Bee Store: https://shop.babylonbee.com/ Follow The Babylon Bee: Website: https://babylonbee.com/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/thebabylonbee Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TheBabylonBee Instagram: http://instagram.com/thebabylonbee SOURCE

Seasons of Blood: 525,600 Minutes of BLM Riots

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Enjoy our touching music video covering the 525,600 minutes of mainstream media hyping up the January 6 Capitol riots while downplaying the BLM riots. Our own parody inspired by Colbert’s parody of Seasons of Love. Parodyception! Become a premium subscriber: https://babylonbee.com/plans The Official The Babylon Bee Store: https://shop.babylonbee.com/ Follow The Babylon Bee: Website: https://babylonbee.com/ Twitter: […]

Podcast Highlight Weak-ly News: Non-Binary Bond & 10 Jabs in One Day

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The Babylon Bee’s Adam Yenser gives you all the news you need to know from the week. Check out the full podcast here: https://youtu.be/7huKG38SIv8 Also, be sure to give Adam’s Youtube channel a follow: https://www.youtube.com/user/adamyenser Become a premium subscriber: https://babylonbee.com/plans The Official The Babylon Bee Store: https://shop.babylonbee.com/ Follow The Babylon Bee: Website: https://babylonbee.com/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/thebabylonbee […]